I must speak on something for a moment. I have had this discussion with several women and men in my life and lets put it on the table for discussion: Gold Digging.
Now what comes to mind when I tell you that? I am sure most people would define this as a woman who is after a man’s money. Who will use his money over hers (if she has any) and will get him for every red cent. But ladies and gentlemen there has been a revolution occurring right under our noses. While us ladies are getting degrees and climbing up the corporate ladder in addition to being fly, being moms and wives there is a new breed of man out there and it may even be someone you know. The male gold digger.
Now I do understand that in this day and age it is very possible and occurs frequently that a woman makes more than a man. But the important thing to remember here is that you are both working and contributing your fair share monetarily, to the relationship. I also understand supporting your significant other if 1) they are going to school and trying to better themselves so that when they get out they will be making more money in the end or 2) the other person is physically ill and does not have the means to contribute financially. 3) The person has recently lost their job and is in the interim pounding the pavement looking for something. Note 1 and 3 *and sometimes2, are all TEMPORARY.
Now what about this male gold digger I was telling you about. Well first of all why any real man would allow his woman to support him financially is beyond me. I always thought that a real man did whatever he had to do to provide for himself as well as his significant other. Also I hope not to offend any woman that is in this position, forgive me; I don’t want to sound like I am attacking at all. Please if I am wrong, comment and tell me why it is okay to support a man who deceives you out of his money with excuses. If a man is physically able to work, but denies it or is unwilling to work, you know what that makes him? Lazy. Selfish even. Some men say they are working on finding a job. If they were looking that hard they would have one. Some men may even ask you to invest in an idea they think will make them money. Run the other way. It’s not your job to invest in someone else’s dreams. Tell that fool to get a job or hit the bricks
The bottom line is that everyone in this day and age needs a steady income. It really doesn’t matter what you do but one thing is for sure. If a couples money ain’t right that shit is not going to work. Point blank. Love does not pay the bills so ladies if you have encountered such a man, please throw that one back into the ocean. There are many more men out there that will treat you right and not make you pay for them when you go out or worse yet them and their friends (yikes! I’ve seen that one too! Not pretty). If you got your *ish together than it shouldn’t be hard to find a man with the same attitude. Be patient and tell those gold diggin men to come back when they have something more to offer than a headache.
Now what comes to mind when I tell you that? I am sure most people would define this as a woman who is after a man’s money. Who will use his money over hers (if she has any) and will get him for every red cent. But ladies and gentlemen there has been a revolution occurring right under our noses. While us ladies are getting degrees and climbing up the corporate ladder in addition to being fly, being moms and wives there is a new breed of man out there and it may even be someone you know. The male gold digger.
Now I do understand that in this day and age it is very possible and occurs frequently that a woman makes more than a man. But the important thing to remember here is that you are both working and contributing your fair share monetarily, to the relationship. I also understand supporting your significant other if 1) they are going to school and trying to better themselves so that when they get out they will be making more money in the end or 2) the other person is physically ill and does not have the means to contribute financially. 3) The person has recently lost their job and is in the interim pounding the pavement looking for something. Note 1 and 3 *and sometimes2, are all TEMPORARY.
Now what about this male gold digger I was telling you about. Well first of all why any real man would allow his woman to support him financially is beyond me. I always thought that a real man did whatever he had to do to provide for himself as well as his significant other. Also I hope not to offend any woman that is in this position, forgive me; I don’t want to sound like I am attacking at all. Please if I am wrong, comment and tell me why it is okay to support a man who deceives you out of his money with excuses. If a man is physically able to work, but denies it or is unwilling to work, you know what that makes him? Lazy. Selfish even. Some men say they are working on finding a job. If they were looking that hard they would have one. Some men may even ask you to invest in an idea they think will make them money. Run the other way. It’s not your job to invest in someone else’s dreams. Tell that fool to get a job or hit the bricks
The bottom line is that everyone in this day and age needs a steady income. It really doesn’t matter what you do but one thing is for sure. If a couples money ain’t right that shit is not going to work. Point blank. Love does not pay the bills so ladies if you have encountered such a man, please throw that one back into the ocean. There are many more men out there that will treat you right and not make you pay for them when you go out or worse yet them and their friends (yikes! I’ve seen that one too! Not pretty). If you got your *ish together than it shouldn’t be hard to find a man with the same attitude. Be patient and tell those gold diggin men to come back when they have something more to offer than a headache.
8 comments:
i've known two guys to get away with that. one a personal trainer & the other a bar tender. both professions can fall into the penniless category. yet, the guys are usually pretty good looking, physical (you get the gist), & sweet talkers by trade.
you kill me ms. V! how do you even think of this stuff!?! laf
While I believe in equal opportunity in every facet of life, this one is just sad. As nice as it would be for someone to pay my loans off in one shot, it ain't happening. First of all, even if it is golddigging, I'd still have to do something for it and I'm too lazy.
Seriously though, I've always been amazed that based off of looks or 'performance' that a few folks in the world can manipulate a situation to get whatever they want. Don't they know that karma is a bitch?
HECK NO! There is no way I am supporting any man. Gold-digging males - look the other way.
-C.
Ya know, their game plan is real simple like that song, Conceited, my girl Remy who is know in the slammer for shooting her quote/unquote friend (but I digress) "You gotta have the mind and state that I'm so great and can nobody do it like I do"... These giggahoes hook these chicks into thinking that they are the bee's knees!!! My whole point is ... money does talk and I'd rather be alone with my designer purse babbling than with a man that's worth pa' na' (USNAVYS, keeping it real) and a mute wallet. Mang FUNK DAT!!!! It all goes back to that expectations entry Miss V! U gotta have some set, or you WILL get dupped by that personal trainer or bar tender into thinking they are doing YOU favor... Shiieet I don't need anybody that bad! I'll buy a dog, at least it'll fetch my slippers.
PS and if you're down with paying for it, that man better be excellent at putting out on demand...!!!! My cousin once said, what's worse than being called a whore is lazy because even whores do work...!!!
++Just D++
your comments make me smile- All very good feedback. I feel sorry for that personal trainer and that bartender cuz sooner or later thier looks and physical greatness will fade away and then what? and yes ultimately those who are the diggers will have to do something to keep that cash coming- whether its being a stallion or sweetalking or lying or whatever, theri is some type of manipulation tool involved. Ugh- that situation has to suck!
there is a wise proverb that goes: When poverty comes in the door love flies out the window, and believe u me this will be the truth till the end of time.
If men and women want to stick it out in a relationship, there should be no lazy business goin on, love does not pay the bills. and although some men in this day and age are under the assumption that women have all these rights,doesnt give these mofos have a right to ride on our manolos after we worked damn hard to get where we are at. A little respect, and good work ethic is necessary in finding a decent man these days. My man is outside right now hobbling on cane goin to work cuz he KNOWs we got bills to pay.
I know it's random, but I am reminded of that early 90s movie with Damon Wayans:
"Mo money, mo money, mo money!"
If someone I'm with is making a few dollars to come with my few dollars:
1) I get better loving in any sense
2) There's obviously less stress (not that there aren't financial stresses, but it's easier to cope when both are doing their part).
But more important to me is
3) it's what the f*** you're supposed to do! I don't know how to let someone else pick up the slack for me, so how other guys can do that is beyond me. Maybe I'm on drugs or something.
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